I am rare but there

So it begins...

Hey everyone. Hope you're all good and enjoyed Bitches UnleaSHE'd on Saturday night. I heard it was an amazing night and I'm sorry I couldn't attend. Mistress Brown and Miss Kitty always try their best to make the night enjoyable and their main goal is for everyone to have lots of fun - Which I am hearing they certainly succeeded in that! Woo!! Well done girls :)

I know I wrote a small blog last month just as an update as to what's been going on recently with Me. It was short and brief. Since then I've been eager to write a more in depth one. I'm naturally quite a bubbly person that jokes a lot and I don't really like writing about morbid things so this is why I haven't wrote anything recently as there's not many happy things to be writing about at the moment. I am finding a lot of comfort through twitter. The amount of messages, gifts and offers of help have blown Me away. You really are a lovely caring bunch of people and I will be forever grateful. 

After speaking with Mistress Evilyne and expressing My concerns She told Me to write what I want and to be My usual self...
I am sitting here writing this in deep thought, emotional and scared about what tomorrow is going to bring. I never thought I'd be writing these blogs. I never thought I'd be painting My toenails on the eve of My first chemotherapy session just so My feet still remain beautiful. I never thought that I'd have chemo mouthwash, digital thermometers and head beanies on My wishlist... and I never ever thought My 65 year old dad would have been shaving My head in tears yesterday. Yes, its gone! I made the decision to shave it off on My own terms around My family. I couldn't have dealt with watching clumps of My hair fall out, so I took control of this sucky situation and made it My own. 


I really want to speak about the type of cancer I have. it's called Nueroendocrine (NET) small cell carcinoma of the cervix - Typically known as a lung cancer. Around 1 -2 woman get diagnosed with this a year in the UK and there's simply not enough research been done to find a successful treatment protocol due to the rarity of the disease. Not enough woman globally been diagnosed yet to do a study. Small cell nueroendocrine is usually found in the lungs so My treatment is going to be the same as a lung cancer patient. I will be given 13 hours of chemo a month with cisplatin and etoposide. 

The main reason I'm telling you this is because no one I know (including myself) has ever heard of this form of cervical cancer and although it's rare - Awareness needs to start now! I'll add that Nueroendocrine in cervix is in no way related to the HPV virus like the more common cervical cancers.
It CAN'T be detected in smears and they are still working on other methods to help detect it earlier. If I hadn't have had My hysterectomy (That I'm now counting as a blessing) they would have never have found this. By the time they would've found it it would've already had spread to different parts of the body as the rapid growing cancer as it is. I'm going to try and stay positive, Keep laughing and keep being Me and I have every finger and toe crossed that this doesn't return when I've finished My treatment.

Again I just want to thank every single one of you for the DM's to take the time and send Me a message. You have been helping Me more than you're aware - During probably the most mentally challenging time of My life. 

I'll keep you posted :)

MSJ x

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