Expectation of a Domme

                                                              Expectations of a Domme

When I started Domming 5 years ago I was eager to fit into a box. We call it the Domme box. You must stay in this box and never allow anyone to see you come out of it. You have an image to maintain and if you were to be seen acting outwith your persona you've created you would be unsuccessful and fail, end off. 

Can you imagine having to act a certain way day in day out with a ton of pressure on you to try maintain this online character? It's bloody hard and I take My hat off to those Dommes who have managed to do it for so long. Don't get me wrong I completely understand why it is important. We portray an image and it's that image that men fall for. I mean guys have a certain expectation of how we live or more to the point how we SHOULD live. We've got to ONLY post pictures that make us seem in control always wearing our leathers, we have a high class lifestyle so only shop at Dior and Louis Vuitton. The truth is, in real life, most of Us are nothing like our characters. I haven't even got a pair of Loubs as you probably thought. I'm quite happy with My Kurt Geigers and River Island haha! 
Although... If anyone is offering??? LOL

One thing I've always kept down is my feet. They've always been firmly on the ground. My head has never got stuck up my arse and I hope that people have seen that. I've watched so many Dommes overtime getting carried away with themselves and they eventually crash. It's sad.  

A few examples of the so called 'rules'

  • A slave to my good friend was completely gobsmacked when he saw her eat a Mcdonalds! I mean seriously?? Does eating a Maccie D's mean you're less Dominant? 
  • I got told that I should stop changing My hairstyles and keep My weight consistent. Eh say what!
  • I should have a trademark look (something I've never had as I like to change styles so often)
  • Never show yourself naked because it's making yourself look cheap and that's not an appropriate thing for a Mistress to do.
  • A Mistress is not an Escort therefore shouldn't give handjobs. (I enjoy it, so I bloody well will)
  • Never allow your followers to get an insight of your private life - Bla! 



It would be easy to say that we should all be able to do what we want and we are just like any other woman, but we're not really are we? We've chosen this lifestyle and as much as we don't like to admit it there are certain things we should stick to. That being said, who made these 'rules' up? Isn't BDSM meant to be fun? Can't we laugh and have a joke without being judged? Bloody hell!!

As time has went on, especially over the last 18 months I'm feel so much better, more relaxed and definitely not as stressed. I'm putting this down to caring less what people think. I've allowed my true self to come out more, even in session. What you're seeing online these days is Miss Sarah Jessica aka Sarah. Yes Sarah is My real name. If I want to show some of my private life - I will. I've found that my followers actually enjoy finding out a bit more about my personality before booking a session. If I was to put myself in their position I would do exactly the same. 

I've had people ask why I'm doing Vlogs on my youtube channel. No particular reason really other than I'm enjoying making them and I'm hoping you guys are enjoying them so far. (I'm still learning ha!)

My point is this... Trying to fit into one of these boxes is the worst thing you can do. Don't start off on the wrong foot and make the same mistake many of us have made. Be yourself, be confident in yourself, believe in yourself and most importantly, just have fun with it. This would be my advice.

People have the right to grow and by feeling more happy and content, you become a better Mistress for it...

MSJ xx

Follow Me - @MissSarahJessic



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